Monthly Archives: March 2018

I Love Sarah Huckabee Sanders!

I am in love with Sarah Huckabee Sanders!  But first….a little history pre-Sarah….

My first love-from-afar love interest was Juliet Prowse.  In 1960, Juliet starred in two movies, Can-Can and GI Blues.  I particularly admired her in GI Blues because she played opposite one of my favorite people, Elvis Presley.  Juliet had a fantastic smile, a cheery personality, red hair, and at 5’11”, she had beautiful legs up to her neck.  What more could a farm boy of 12 want from a girl?  Tragically, Juliet died at the age of 59 from cancer.  She jumped started my puberty by at least 3 years!

In 1963, at the age of 15, my taste in women changed.  I discovered that I really was attracted more to brunettes than to blonds.   My theory at the time was that most of the brunettes had natural color brunette hair, whereas, during the 60’s, most of the blonds had natural brunette hair, too.  So, into my young tender life comes who I consider to be the most attractive actress to ever live…..Elizabeth Taylor.  I mention the year 1963 because it was the year that great movie, Cleopatra, was released.  To this day, with all of the actresses that have had cosmetic surgery, I still consider Elizabeth Taylor to be the most beautiful actress of my lifetime.  If you have seen the movie, Cleopatra, and her entrance into the city of Rome, well it was truly spectacular and I have never seen a woman look more stunning.  The term used by men would be ‘drop dead gorgeous.’  And if you did not think so after seeing her, you did not have a pulse.

In the 1970’s, we had Charlie’s Angels.  Farrah Fawcett, Jaclyn Smith and Kate Jackson were the ‘Angels.’  While all of my male friends were going ‘ga-ga’ over Farrah Fawcett and bought her swimsuit poster, I remained true to my brunette belief and actually liked Kate Jackson the best.

Then something truly amazing happened.  I grew up.  While in my earlier life, like most young men, I considered appearance as the only component of beauty.  Then I began to mature and realized that there were other components to beauty.  One such component is personality.  I discovered that it was not enough to have just an attractive woman on your arm, but you had to enjoy being with that woman as well.  Then I discovered another component to beauty, intelligence.  The conversation cannot continue about puppy dogs and unicorns, eventually there needs to be a conversation with a little depth to it. Those are the characteristics that make a woman appealing to me.  (Is this the definition of maturity?)

Enter Sarah Huckabee Sanders.  (Also, Grandma P over 30 years ago.)  I have to mention Grandma P or I’ll be eating cereal alone at dinner for the next 30 years!  Beautiful, intelligent and personable. Check.  (A fourth criteria is that I decided I could live with Grandma P.)  On to Sarah!  Sarah is 35 years old, married in 2010, and the mother of 3 children all under the age of 8.  Whew!  All of this while being appointed White House press secretary last July 17 upon the resignation of Sean Spicer.

I find Sarah very appealing because she has all of the components that I have outlined as being beautiful.  Personality?  Check.  Appearance?  Check.  Intelligence?   Well………..here are the headlines that I pulled off the internet today, Sunday, that she no doubt will have to address in the White House press briefing tomorrow and the coming week:

  1.  Ann Coulter, Laura Ingraham warn Trump will be impeached after signing spending bill.
  2. Ivanka takes President Trump to task over his treatment of Jared Kushner.
  3. There are the worst things Donald Trump’s “friends” have said about him
  4. Donald Trump routinely humiliates whoever he pleases.
  5. Melania joins Trump amid cheating scandals as family leaves D.C. ahead of March For Our Lives.
  6. Americans will pay the price for Trump’s toughened approach with China
  7. Trump’s new National Security Adviser has ties to Cambridge Analytica.

These are headlines from today’s news!  Do you see a pattern?  Does anything positive about Trump or his presidency or positive about America make it to the news anymore?

And, dear readers, who will be standing on the podium before a room full of media types to bring levity to a litany of negative headlines?  Why, that would be Sarah Huckabee Sanders.  (Did you notice I did not call the media types; reporters?  If I called them reporters, that would imply that they researched a subject and then ‘reported’ it in an unbiased manner.  That doesn’t happen anymore.)  I challenge you to watch the White House press briefings this week so that you can see first hand that Sarah is the sharpest knife in that drawer of people in the White House press room.  I admire her for being able to raise 3 children under the age of 8, and then handle a room full of media types who ask questions as if they were 8.  And like an 8 year old, they will ask the same question repeatedly, expecting a different answer if they ask it four times.  Watch how Sarah will handle them like the ringmaster of a three ring circus!

Even though the media has attacked her physical appearance, I find Sarah extremely attractive.  After all, any juggler can juggle 3 tennis balls, but Sarah can juggle at least 5 running chainsaws at a time.  And….working for Donald Trump cannot be easy, especially since he is a media target.

Admittedly, I don’t really love Sarah Huckabee Sanders in the biblical sense of the word.  After all, I just celebrated the 30th anniversary of my 40th birthday, making me 8 years older than her dad, Mike Huckabee.  That would be creepy.  But I do greatly admire her for who she is, what she has done, and her capabilities. Because of this, I find her extremely beautiful.   So, Sarah, if you read this blog, I would be happy to be the president of your fan club, and Grandma P and I live close to your dad so we would be happy to babysit your kids one night.  You Go Girl!!!!

My One Hundredth Blog!

Yup, this is blog numero 100!

I wrote this blog for three reasons:

  1.  I needed something to do after retirement.  It became evident that I only had so many lawn ornaments to paint, one lawn to cut, and too few bushes to trim to keep me busy.  And, I did not really like writing high school and college term papers so I decided to ‘step out of the box.’
  2. I wanted to write something that my grandkids may eventually read so they can see how their grandpa and grandma were raised and how America was much different during our formative years.  They would be appalled to learn that I can remember when both of my sets of grandparents did not have indoor plumbing.  We left our houses and cars unlocked.  I have tried to include some of those items in my blogs to create historical interest.  So far, no grandkid readers.
  3. It is no secret that I am a conservative.  I was irritated and disappointed that Barrack Obama got reelected, pretty much because he was black and not because he was qualified.  I understand why he beat John McCain in 2008.  McCain ran on a platform of being a political maverick.  He did not connect with the younger voters at all.  And…lets be honest, many people wanted to say they voted for the first black president. (Read blog #1, November 2012.)  But Mitt Romney was a different and much better candidate.  Successful businessman, successful governor, he had all the qualifications of being a great president.  But the campaign became racist, the biased liberal media did not pass up an opportunity to smear him, even though we had high unemployment, stagnant growth, an escalating national debt, a declining military, radical Islamic terrorism….all of the important issues that should have been of concern to Americans were overlooked for the sake of reelecting a marginal-at-best black president.  Now we have learned that the Obama campaign hired Fusion GPS to deliberately smear Mitt Romney.. History will bear this out.  So, as I am typing this,  I am contemplating whether there will be a blog 101.  My original goal of 100 blogs has now been met.  My thanks to Houston Nefoo, Grandma P and the Bayou Mauler for assisting me with my hobby.

Mexifornia! Could We Be So Lucky To See It Happen?

Have you heard about the rumblings coming from the left (West) coast about California seceding from the Union?  Yeah, I have heard those rumblings, too.  So, like a desperate poker player in a high stakes tournament, I am throwing all of my chips into the pot and calling their bluff.  But….before we all get hasty about our opinion on this matter, let’s review the pros and the cons to the State of California and to the United States of America as a result of a California succession.

The advantages for California.

Did you see on the news this morning that the Department of Justice is filing suit against California over the issue of non-cooperation between ICE (US Immigration and Customs Enforcement) and California law enforcement agencies?  Yup.  Many of the mayors of large cities in California have directed their law enforcement agencies not to cooperate with any federal enforcement agency.  The mayor of Oakland warned illegal immigrants that there was an impending ICE sweep.   So, if California seceded, this would all go away.  Problem solved for the future Mexifornia!  No matter if a person is there illegally, or if they have a criminal record, they would all be welcome with open arms in the new, tolerant country of Mexifornia.

California has 53 Representatives in Congress.  They could disband their state legislature, and these 53 representatives could replace them and save lots of money.  That just leaves two US Senators out in the wind.  That would be Dianne Feinstein and Kamala Harris.  But think of this, maybe Dianne Feinstein could become the president of Mexifornia, as she is the senior senator, and Kamala Harris could become Vice President.  For this to happen, Governor Jerry Brown would have to retire so as to not mess up the pecking order.  But Jerry will be 80 years old next month and should retire.  After all, Governor Jerry is responding to the DOJ lawsuit as a ‘political stunt.’  He goes on to say that ‘political stunts’, (in this case, federal laws!), will not work in California.  Way to go Jerry!  Now if we could only get you to go out the door to retirement so that we can implement our plan to make Dianne Feinstein president of Mexifornia.

Just think of the cabinet that could be selected for Mexifornia.  The Kardashian sisters could be the joint secretaries of state.  After all, what group would know more about international affairs?  If experience is the best teacher, that great liberal political contributor, Harvey Weinstein should be the Human Resources director.  The door would have to be removed from his office for security reasons and his office must be devoid of any sofas or couches.

I would nominate Kathy Griffin for Mexifornia Homeland Security.  Firstly, she scares the hell out of me, so that would make her qualified.  Secondly, wouldn’t you like to see Donald Trump holding her bloody head at a White House press briefing?  Just sayin’.

If California seceded, they could raise the taxes on everything and everybody without recourse.  If a bunch of foreign conservatives (those from the USA!) were visiting Disneyland or taking the Hollywood tour, they could have an additional 100% tariff assessed to their tickets.  Nancy Pelosi would absolutely love the opportunity to assess ridiculous amount of tariffs to visiting conservatives.  After all, she is the person responsible for saying that the $1000 employee bonuses as a result of the Trump tax plan were ‘crumbs.’  With that in mind, the entrance fee to visit Disneyland would be a crumby $1500 per day per person, or, in other words….a crumb and a half per person.  She has also said that the latest federal budget proposal is a lot of ‘dog-do.’  How would Disney like to be paid in that?  Yup.  She qualifies as the new head of the IRS for Mexifornia.

The new country of Mexifornia would not have to be concerned about enforcing voter registration eligibility laws.  Oh wait, that is not an advantage, they don’t enforce these laws now.  California follows the blood pressure theory of voter eligibility….if you have a pulse, you can vote.  But here is an advantage, most of the Mexifornia citizens could vote in two countries, Mexifornia and Mexico.  The next time I visit Mexico, I am going to vote in their election.  Isn’t that what reciprocity is all about?

In all seriousness, I believe that if a vote was to be taken in California on succession, it would be a close election.  With 39 of the 53 US Representatives being liberals, you can see my point.  (20% of the Democratic US Respresetatives in Congress come from California.)

Advantages to the United States with a California Succession

A big advantage for the US of A would be that the Department of Justice would not have to enforce federal jurisdiction over the new country of Mexifornia.  This would save the taxpayers money and the DOJ a whole lot of headaches.  No cost for FBI agents in Mexifornia.  No cost for Border Patrol in Mexifornia.  No ICE agents in Mexifornia.  Isn’t that what California wants?  That would save lots of money for the US.

Here is another advantage for the USA.  The average staff salaries for a US senator is $2.8 million for Democratic senators, and $2.3 million for Republican senators.  But not to be outdone, in 2011 the two California senators were 1 and 2 in having the highest senatorial staff salaries.  Barbara Boxer was at $4.412 million and Dianne Feinstein was at $4.125 million for their respective staff salaries.  Yup.  They won and placed in the senatorial staff salary horse race.  You can imagine that Kamala Harris is not far behind after replacing Boxer.  That would be almost $10 million saved for the USA team.  But wait…..there’s more!  The average staff budgets for a Democratic representative is $1.024 million, while that for a Republican representative is $900 thousand.  That would save about another $53 million.  Throw in travel expenses and miscellaneous expense accounts, it would be a fair estimate that we would save about $100 million in the US budget.  I have no plausible explanation as to why staff salaries are much higher for the Democrats than the Republicans.  I guess the Democrats just want to spend more money.

As I am the blog writer, I am going to exercise my right of literary license and insert an advantage for the succession of California that may only be of benefit to me.  I would do anything not to have to hear Nancy Pelosi on the national news expounding idiotic drivel that she does so well.  I have already referred to the ‘crumbs’ comment and the one about ‘dog-do.’  Yet, there she is, getting way more camera time than one nitwit deserves.  I would do anything not to have to hear Maxine Waters talk about how she is going to get Donald Trump removed from the oval office, even if she has to do it herself physically.   She wants to impeach him.  No respect.  No cooperation.  Just more Californian drivel.  Again, another example of getting excessive media attention.  It seems that the more insane their comments..the more media attention.  (I do not think I am alone in this belief.)  If Elizabeth Warren from Massachusetts would move to the succeeding California, my life would be complete!

Then there are the overly verbal, whackadoodles in Hollywood.  These are the elite people who spend way too much time attempting to convince you that they are average Americans, just like you and me.  Then they jump into their chauffeur driven limousines, head to some who-gives-a-crap ceremony, and award themselves more trophies and adoration.  They spew their political opinions as if anyone gives a damn.  News flash!  America is waking up to the fact that most of you don’t have a clue what average America is about, nor do we care about your political rantings.

Here’s an advantage to the US.  Think of how much fun it would be to replace California, so we could be back to an even fifty states.  Think of the possibilities!  Puerto Rico?  Nah.  Guam?  Maybe.  Samoa?  I would vote for the Western, free Samoa rather than American Samoa.  If you have been to them, you would know what I mean.  Cuba?  Only by invasion, but don’t totally eliminate it.  Possibly Ontario?  No.  Trudeau would get upset and ban Canadian hockey teams from playing in America.  Bummer, eh.  I cast my vote that the Virgin Islands replace California as the fiftieth state.  That way, we will not have to replace our flags.  Small population = less representatives.   Problem solved.

With all the bluster that comes out of California, here is one advantage for the US that many people are not aware.  California has 17% of the population in the United States.  California receives 34% of all social/welfare dollars distributed in the United States.  If my math and information is correct, that means that the state of California receives over $250 billion dollars from the federal government every year.  That is not chump change or crumbs or dog-do.  And yet they want to flaunt the fact that they do not want to abide by federal government laws, especially those pertaining to immigration.

Trump has threatened to withhold different federal funds for California non-compliance.  Faster than a firecracker, some Federal judge from the left coast will place an injunction on the withholding of the funds.  California getting money from the federal government is like a vasectomy….they want all the fun without the responsibility.

With all of this in mind, who really needs who?  California, with their already high real estate and income taxes would go bust in a second without federal government support.  If I were from California, I would muzzle my politicians, replace them with intelligent people and tread lightly on the succession question.  Maybe it should be left up to the other 49 states to vote if California should secede.  Wouldn’t that be interesting.

I think my ‘all in’ poker ploy has caused all the bluffers to fold.  Another pot for Grandpa T!